Open the eyes of my heart Lord

The past few weeks i have been groaning at the difficult times that i had to go through. Even though i had been strengthened by Jesus at the right times with his life giving words, I felt myself crumbling at the weight of the cross that i was carrying. One day the Lord helped me to meet a friend. It was through her that i came to be more aware of myself from the eyes of God. Which is illustrated in following mail that was sent to me.

The Cross

A young man was at the end of his rope, seeing no way out, dropped to his knees in prayer. "Lord, I can't go on," he said. "I have too heavy of a cross to bear." The Lord replied, "My son, if you can't bear its weight, Just place your cross inside this room. Then, open that other door and pic out any cross you wish." The man was filled with relief said, "Thank you, Lord," and he did as he was told. Upon entering the oter door, he saw many crosses, some so large the tops were not visile. Then, he spoted a timy cross leaning against a far wall. "I'd like that one, Lord," he whispered. And the Lord replied, "My son, that is the cross you just brought in."

how blind i have been. Only looking at myself. Its when I looked around and see what other people are coping with did i actually realize how fortunate I was. My cross through i found it difficult to bear, I know that Jesus will not give me a cross that I cannot carry as he knows my weaknesses. I have stumbled and sometimes fallen in anguish but Christ has always been there for me strengthening ,correcting me and guiding me. Now my prayer is "Open the eyes of my heart Lord"

Difficult times

I have been going through some difficult times recently. Everything in my life was not going the way i wanted it to be but exactly in the opposite manner. Different problems with different dimensions some which i never thought i would have to go through. The real testing part was that it was happening in all aspects of my life. Be it professional , personal and a profound dryness in my spiritual life.

Then i came across this beautiful story of a child who saw a man holding a ugly and dirty piece of metal in the middle of the fire which was being engulfed in the flame. The child in its inquisitive nature was asking the man what are you doing with that ugly and dirty thing. The man asked the child to sit beside him and to watch the metal closely. The child realised that as time went on the fire was melting away the ugly and dirty and slowly but steadily he could see white silver part emerging out of it. The child then asked the man how will you know when the process is completed. The man responded saying "when i see my face in it". The man in the story being Jesus and the ugly and dirty metal being me i realised that , every day when i read the bible yearning to become Christ like, I always forgot what it took Christ to become what he is to us now "Suffering".

Then these verses in the bible which i had read a long time ago, came to my mind.

My child, when you come to serve the Lord, prepare yourself for testing.

Set your heart right and be steadfast, and do not be impetuous in time of calamity.

Cling to him and do not depart, so that your last days may be prosperous.

Accept whatever befalls you, and in times of humiliation be patient.

For gold is tested in the fire, and those found acceptable, in the furnace of humiliation

Trust in him, and he will help you; make your ways straight, and hope in him. - Sirach 2 : 1-6

The last verse gave me a lot of strength to journey on in my life and i pray it does the same for you.